Cassie's Top Ten Tips for Flirting

1. Look over your shoulder, you never know who’s gaining on you: this gesture is universally recognized for framing your face well; it means you’re looking at him, there’s no mistaking your interest, and you’ll have a stiff neck if he doesn’t pick up on the move pretty soon;

2. Be relaxed and “go with the flirt”: OK, for me, that’s like telling me “be tall,” I’m 5’3”, what you see is what you get, and it’s no different in the relaxation department. I’m usually too tense around a stranger, I guess it’s why so much flirting goes accompanied by alcohol, either in bars or at parties. If you’re tense or nervous around a guy, you can do one of the two following tips:

3. Smile, it could be worse— you could be trapped in “The Stepford Wives”: Stepford is in Connecticut. Fucking Connecticut. Where fucking Yale is. Guys like happy girls, they don’t want to be around a sourpuss. Be happy, why shouldn't you put his happiness ahead of yours? It's the way men expect things, right? Right;

4. Listen to him even though he’s boring: One way to seem relaxed is to listen a lot, you can lower your gaze and pretend he’s the most interesting thing on earth. Guys are genetically-programmed to talk about themselves, and usually what he has to say is more interesting than your life, right? Right! Yeah.

5. Ask him what he thinks: You don’t really have to care, questions are both a good way to elicit information and solicit his interest. It shows you find him attractive, even if it’s just a physical turn-on, and isn’t that all that guys really care about? Isn't that all YOU care about?

6. Look at him, but not too intensely: Start by staring at him across the room, or if you’re already acquainted, then make sure you rivet him with your gaze several times over the course of the evening. Drop your head a bit so you’re looking up from beneath your lashes (didn’t I already say that?). Staring without saying anything can be too powerful, use that variation with extreme caution, it says “I’m ready to take you higher";

7. Playful banter is good: don’t intimidate him with your intellect— unless your intellect is wearing black stockings and a garter belt, he’s not looking to fuck that part of your anatomy;

8. Touch him, but easy does it: a nice light touch on the arm, brushing his hand, putting your hand on his shoulder while you bend over to whisper some innocuous detail in his ear, just don’t rub your hands on his ass or other erogenous zones-- unless you're ready for more;

9. Whisper: Guys are crazy about girls with low, husky voices— if God didn’t bless you with one, keep the volume down. Tell him a deep, dark secret— it doesn’t have to be “I want to suck your cock,” you can make it playful like “I think you’re a good candidate for Sterling Professor,” or “Want to know my favorite Deconstructionist?” And lastly…

10. Don’t be married, it limits your options: I didn’t pay attention to that one, and you can see how it turned out for me. Still, what's life without flirting?